I dont know why I still miss you. I don't know why I can't get over you.
I want you to know that I don't like this feeling. I want you to know that i'm not sorry.
I wish you knew how bad you hurt me. I wish you knew that your sorry wasn't enough.
You caused me to lose my friendship. You caused me to feel the hate,the pain,the anger,the unsureness.
I hate you and I love you. Your my yes and my no.




<3

Turn this Place Apart

I'm waiting for you. Ever so patiently wondering when that window's gonna fly open and then we'll be in each others arms again sharing kisses so warm and love so deep that no one and nothing can tear us apart. I'm asking you with all my heart and soul to tear this place apart until you find me. My heart belongs to you and always will. I love you so much and as much as I want to I've come to the conclusion that I just can't let you go. I don't want to. I want you to tear this place apart and JUST FIND ME ALREADY I know we both made mistakes,making words fly like knives hitting our cores. Emotions were spilled like milk,but love always flew towards us both ways connecting us in a never ending evolution  of feelings and passion. So I'm asking from the bottom of my heart to tear that and this and that their place apart so that you can find me. Don't you worry I'm waiting --- just as I've been. Waiting for the truth to hit you.

 your forever patient lover 

If we must part forever,

Give me but one kind word to think upon,
To please myself with, while my heart's breaking.

I've never been this lonely.Now : moot point I'm not that old but this it feels like it's always been there ,it;s just been ,asked by other things. Now that things are gone it seems to just hover it seems to just seems to stand there sucking my soul . I miss all of them. I miss not being able to go back and fix everything that went wrong. Makes me want a drink real bad. Just something to ease up the pain but it seems like nothing can I just can't seem to climb this wall I mean I have friends I have a best friend and others Don't get me wrong I'm not a loner....ok well sometimes I am, I miss not having fun anymore. I miss just being myself, being able to let go of the load that stays on my chest, I miss having someone tease me and make me feel wanted. I hate always feeling like I have to cry all the time.  I hate in order for my self to be happy having to think of past memories they feel so old now...like I made them up. I hate having people tell me how I feel,whom I love . I'm just sick of trying to rise to what they want. I just want to be loved and happy is that so wrong?

I'm tired of feeling like this I just want all these feelings to go away and to stay away only coming when I need their warmth and security. I CAN'T HELP HOW I FEEL . I ONLY LOVED YOU BECAUSE YOU LOVED ME.... And for that I am truly sorry

'REGISTER'

Fuck this (excuse my language)

I can't seem to fit in.
I'm tried of this shit
(excuse my language)
I'm not trying to fit in
I'm trying to stand out
I don't wanna be normal
I want to be seen
I want to be heard
to be loved
to be cared for
to be listened to
I'm done with this shit (excuse my language)
I just want to be me....
Is that bad?

For you

Dear Obession of the HEart,
 I can't seem to control myself, this lust seems to control me. I honestly don't want to stop the feelings. I love the power you make me feel. I love the way you make me feel loved when no one else does,even if your made up of our old summer memories,wishes,and hidden feelings....you feel so ALIVE. Don't go away please. I love you. A lot and it's not going away. In every guy I see I see you. I feel your touch,your kiss. Your hands. Your smile. Your laugh. I feel you when I'm cold and lonely. I feel you when I'm scared. I feel you when I need someone. I need you. Come back?

we could've had it all We could've hit a home run You rained on my parade .. And then you ran away.